So i met an olypic gold medalist last night! woohooooo!
And she let me hold it! SO AWSOME!!!
its sooooo heavy!
i just wanted to let everybody know that! :D

not really in the mood to write anything more!!

xo

p.s. oh ya my friend michelle is leaving for Paris on friday.. :( and we´re having a party tonight.. but it´s the last night to see her.. i´m so sad to see her go! but glad she´s following her heart! mucho respecto!!!!

Well.... my legs are just a wee bit sore! hehe
i want a cigarette... but at the same time i dont.. wierd! I guess it helps that my family doesn't smoke!
i have sooo much to do still, my first priority is selling all my stuff i guess, i just hope i can bring my senseo coffee maker!!!!! it's so pretty!! hehe and of course it makes great coffee!!
So if anybody that lives in holland needs furniture, a scooter or just random crap let me know!
i told my ex-bestfriend what was on my mind, the fact that i think my ex-boyfriend is a pedofile, and more of course.. come on she's 17 and he's almost 30! i guess i wasn't young enough for him!! hehe

oh well life must move on and i'm ready for it now!
and on top of this stuff.. i am trying to get a clear image of what i want my tattoo to be like simple but funky like me i think :P haha no way there isn't anything simple about me! :D

blaaah still hacking up my lungs!! so grosssss!

i guess this is it for now!

xoxoxoxoxo

So i thought instead of sending a billion seperate messages n stuff, i could just blog it!
A lot has changed for me since i came back from canada. So it took me a total of 17 hours to finally sit down and relax on my couch! I was sitting there waiting for my best friend to come over, and i realised that this wasn't my home anymore. I don't think that is a feeling i have ever had in my life.. to come back to your house and not feel at home. So i started to think, and i made a loose plan in my head that i am going back to Canada. But i thought maybe i should just let it sink in for a few days or weeks. And having done that my will to go back to my birth country is even bigger!!! so friends and family.. here's the news you've all been waiting for (drum roll please) I am moving back to canada!!! yaaaay! I don't know for how long but hey i'm just going to go with the flow!

So going back to the moment where i was waiting on my couch for my best friend, knock knock, she's here! big hug and a kiss and we sat doen to talk about stuff! and i could see on her face something wasn't right. And here it came...'Rachel, i need to tell you something' i knew exactly what she was going to say. it's wierd when you can predict whats going to happen, and you know it ain't good. ' Martin and me (martin my ex) got togeher when you were in Canada' pause.... oh ya i sorta expected that!
This extent of my anger goes beyond anger itself.
At first i was ok with it i had just been home for 10 minutes!!!!! Then i lt it sink in and realised i wasn't ok with it! I started counting the times that i have had 'best friends' do this to me. and every single time i have just rolled over on my back! This time is different no way am i going to put up with this!
So i took a stand for my self! i don't want poisonous people in my life anymore!

slowly i am weeding out the bad seeds in my life and cleansing myself. the best thing i could ever have done! so when i get to Canada i will be free of feeling like i have to please everybody, everyday of every minute!
I am now a non-smoker! all of 3 days! sick as a dog... but i guess it will pay off! hehe
My mum and i are going to go for a run after we've had some coffee and food! to get back in to shape! EVERYDAY!!!

I'm so excited to start this new chapter in my life. Im DONE with all this bullshit i've been putting up with my whole life. I am going to stand up for myself and tell people no!
I know in Canada i will be surrounded by loving people like my family, and never to forget my soul sister, also of course some new friends that i have made and most definately the old ones!

So peoples here is the first of my many blogs! I will keep you updated on my plans and things!!! I can't wait to get to Canada!!!!!!!!!!!!

xoxoxoxo